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Things I’ll Miss About Life: Part 6/7 of Blank (Cream Cheese and Wheat Thins)

So I know it’s been two days AND I didn’t even have a segue into this, so for that, I apologize.  So let’s not waste any time.

I effing love cream cheese.  Philadelphia cream cheese may be one of the greatest inventions ever invented.  I use an excessive amount of cream cheese on bagels.   When I say excessive, I mean excessive.  I mean a quarter of a container for one bagel.  One container of cream cheese has never made it through a 6 bagel pack.  The only thing better than original cream cheese is…

 

STRAWBERRY CREAM CHEESE!   Just thinking about it makes me salivate.  Do you wanna know what’s really, really good?  Dip Wheat Thins in strawberry cream cheese and get back to me.  When you do, you’ll be like, “Holy sh-t, Angelo.  My mouth just had an experience.”  That’s the only way to classify it.  As an experience.   Strawberry cream cheese fills any void in my eating life.    For example, I like my sandwiches dry.  I hate mustard.  I’m not a fan of mayo.  Not too terribly keen on ketchup.  I’m not a spread-kind-of-guy.  So how do I make my ham and cheese sandwiches interesting?  I use strawberry cream cheese as a spread. Amazing.

I hate the small little containers of cream cheese restaurants and bagel shops give you when you order a bagel.  There is no way that is enough cream cheese.  It’s like one knife-ful.  When has one knife-ful of cream cheese ever satisfied anybody.  It’s like, “Give me ten more of those and get back to me.”   There is no doubt in my mind that I will miss cream cheese and strawberry cream cheese when die.

So since I missed an entry yesterday, consider this a BONUS entry.  I already mentioned it earlier and it’s in the subject of the post.  That’s write, I love Wheat Thins.  Like hardcore like them.  Like one box can’t even make it through a half hour TV show.  I am a Wheat Thin destroyer.  Even the family size boxes can satiate me.  I wish I had an in at the Wheat Thin company (or the Nabisco company if they’re the ones that own Wheat Thins).  If I could win a lifetime supply of Wheat Thins, I would enter whatever raffle offered that or do any dare that depended on it.   I can’t get over how much I love Wheat Thins.   Their slogan should be “One box is never enough.”

Speaking of “one box is never enough,” my next favorite things is…Girl Scout Cookies.  But which girl scout cookie is your favorite, Angelo?  Well, you’ll have to wait until tomorrow to find out.

#bestcliffhangerever